Excuse me, but have you seen my December?

I seem to have misplaced it. It is just a big blur of white.

New Hampshire:



Connecticut (it snowed twice):

tree at the New Haven green (Kara, I really was just like Rory!)

New York:

Rockefeller center

Combined with a small-scale Christmas of warmth and laughter with family and friends (and Wii Music handbell performances), it was an incredible end to 2008. And hey, at this point I’m only four days late in declaring myself ready for the New Year as far as the calendar is concerned!

Now it is time for the New Year pensive. DH always tells me I speak only in abstractions, but changing that is not one of my resolutions so feel free to skim on:

I’ve really enjoyed the year-end reviews splashing across various blogs these past few weeks. (An an especial congrats to those making big changes, like Nashville’s newest homeowner!) And as always, I was delighted to find peeps who expressed exactly what I’d been feeling. Erin (who tends to do this quite a bit) pretty much summed up my view of New Year’s a few days ago, writing that she loved the process of reevaluating her life and making changes for the better–even if the changes themselves can be an extended process (Erin, is that an apt paraphrase? Oh, and I dislike New Year’s Eve, too!).

2008 was the first year of my life that I’ve felt old (I’m 26, so I guess it is about time). I suppose that feeling came with the realization that my options are not as plentiful as they once were. That statement is not nearly as pessimistic as it might read–rather, I feel like I have explored lots of options, which requires accepting some things into my life and excluding others. Sometimes this process is a choice, sometimes not. I have always found it hard to live with the realization that I can’t be everything, so the exclusion is the trying part.

Yet it is intensely freeing to know that I have chosen to be this person, and, upon arrival at a rather arbitrary calendric marker that still somehow feels entirely right, to evaluate and lay out steps to be a better one. Nearly all of my resolutions fall into the category of increasing my sense of purpose–how I eat, how I move (note I did NOT say exercise! I haven’t changed that much!), how I talk to and about other people, how I prioritize my time. Most of all I want to get over this grad-school-induced isolation and talk to people again. I miss people, and having conversations that don’t rely on a display of intelligence but rather compassion (hint: one I have, the other not so much!!).

I don’t know where you are, but I hope you have had one of those humbling moments of clarity sometime in your life when you realize how important certain decisions in your past were in the creation of who you are today. And I also hope that however hard those decisions were to make, and however difficult the repercussions of those choices were to live out, you are happy to be the person that resulted from them.

Oh, and I want to make a decent pair of pants. But more about that later…


6 comments so far

  1. k on

    Sounds like a good finish to the year – and lots of (okay, somewhat abstract) thoughts on the new one. Good luck with your resolutions and plans for 2009, and with the pants (sounds like something I would like to do too!).

  2. […] Excuse me, but have you seen my December? « Sulala […]

  3. girlwhoknits on

    You paraphrased me perfectly. I love this post and I often reflect on the same things. Here is to even more clarity and growth in 2009.

  4. Jodi on

    Sounds like a thoughtful way to begin the new year. I know what you mean about the isolation. I’d add humor to the list of desirables, in addition to compassion.

    Beautiful photos of New England. How picturesque! I feel like Rory whenever I visit New Haven, too.

  5. Kara on

    Oh you are such a Rory! This post was so great. It really is a perfect time to reflect and reset for the upcoming year. I know it is going to be a good one!

  6. Octopus Knits on

    Happy New Year! Here’s to great pants 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: